Checking In

As I mentioned in my last post, we taught Knox to growl.  I don't mean to say that he wasn't doing it before, just that we began ... a growling conversation, as you might have seen in the video.  When I tried to get him to growl back at me the next day, this happened.

Yes, I had to prompt him more than once to make this face.  Yes, he eventually cried and I stopped.

So it would seem we're taking a step back on the communication front.  But where am I in regards to my New Year's Resolutions?  I'm glad you asked.

Be healthy.  I haven't consumed a coke of any kind in weeks people.  I don't know if I'm necessarily drinking more water... but tea and coffee are made from water so that counts right?  I'm jogging three times a week in preparation for my very first ever 5k race in Dallas on April 15.  It's very slow going.  When Knox comes with me it's so slow we're almost going backwards.

Be happy.  I have failed miserably at purposefully finding something every day to be thankful for - not to be read as I am unhappy.  Room for improvement.

Be smart.  Compulsive spending?  Don't think I've done a lot lately and we've been pretty good about donating (or at least adding to the to-donate pile) or giving away the things we don't use often.  It's really liberating.  Photography business still very disorganized, but I have an excuse - every one I want to ask for advice on legal+business type issues is having or just had a baby.  Probably not the best time.

Be present.  Check and check.  Loving life, family, job - something is in the works with the last two things.  No, I'm not pregnant.  Details to come. 

• 
  

Sandwiches vs. Reality -or- Being a Good Wife

Don't you just love it when life fits together in that puzzle piece way?  When you hear a word or message that speaks to you somewhere down deep and it's just so applicable...

That happened, to me, today.

My friend Sarah shared an inspiring podcast ('The Respectful Wife' by Mark Driscoll) with me and a few other of her married compadres today- bonus!  It's a free sermon.  (Search Mars Hill Church in your iTunes to find some more... think I'll be doing that soon.)  I'd upload it here but it's nearly an hour long - I highly encourage you women to go and check it out!

Whoa.  It's always been a struggle for me to be a deliberate person - deliberate in word and deed as a girl-now-woman, a daughter, sister, wife, teacher, mother...  I'm a boisterous, opinionated, passionate, highly independent but sometimes self-righteous person, and it's hard to be deliberate when your mouth moves faster than your brain.  I was convicted to be a more deliberate wife in thought, word and action because of Mr. Driscoll's biblical and God-hearted message.

It got me thinking - where else can I be more deliberate?  A message I kept hearing over and over in the podcast was "Are you a nag?  Do you drill, drill, drill a message in?"  *Squirming like the proverbial schoolboy* Maybe Mr. Driscoll was prodding a sore spot... In a particular class period students are always saying 'You're so negative!!'  Let me say, it never ceases to take me by surprise.  I have NEVER been called a negative person, in any arena.  But as Art Instructor Mrs. Andrews in First Period I am 'negative' because I 'always tell them what they're drawing wrong'... but I know I'm not.  What I know is that they won't get better until they fix their mistakes.  What I know is that I'm following the 'sandwich method' - for those of you who didn't study education, that is when you begin a critique with a 'warm fuzzy', add your criticism, and finish with another 'fuzzy'.  It's all very technical.

But no matter how many sandwiches I present my kids, regardless of how firmly my methods are built upon best practices, the reality is that they feel criticized.  The reality is that I need to be deliberately positive and encouraging.  And I started thinking - obviously a 2:1 ratio of encouragement to criticism is faulty.  People (husbands, children, students, friends) need to hear good things about themselves - to the point where one feels repetitive.  I may know that I'm supporting Koby, but the reality may be that he's focused on a criticism that I utttered in a moment of frustration.  Being deliberate, showing discretion: it takes effort.  Being a good wife, teacher, mother should be hard.  I think it's something for which we must continually strive.

So, as I listened to my free podcast while Knox napped after school, I was motivated and inspired to to apologize to Koby for some hurtful things I'd said when I should have been encouraging and understanding.  Here's the scenario that happened:

Enter Husband.
Husband: Hey, whatcha doin?
Me: Oh, listening to a sermon on how to be a better wife.
Husband: Huh, that's what my devotional was about today.
Me: What?
Husband: On being a good husband.
Both: Smile.
Enter swoon.

And life just sometimes fits.  Thanks God.

In other news, we taught Knox to growl.

Post # Admitting Defeat of It's About Time

Any other moms out there overwhelmed by the sheer number of things we can buy for babies?  I'm here to present you with the things I've personally learned to love ... and live without.  Obviously, every family, every baby, every mother is different - but if you're planning a baby shower, expecting a bouncing bundle, or still washing pureed carrots out of your hair, this may help.

NEED IT
definition: Spend money on this.  It's worth it, and there's really not a duplicate.

1. Bumbo Chair.  This is great for pre-high chair babies.  You can get them for around $30, they're easy to clean, light, good for eating and playing.

2. Strollers for All Occasions.  I run (sometimes).  I needed a jogging stroller.  Sweet husband bought me the In-Step jogging stroller for X-mas. (A bargain at $130 - I am OBSESSED.  Unfortunately they no longer make them.)  In addition to a 'heavy-duty' stroller, I would pick up the <$20 Cosco stroller at Walmart.  It's great for quick trips, easy to fold/unfold and transport around.

3. Boudreaux's Butt Paste.  It. is. the. best.  It's all-natural, doesn't smell like what I remember butt cream smelling like, and has a funny name.  Get it anywhere.

4. Toys for Carrier.  Get the toys that can clip around the handle of your baby carrier.  The two I usually have attached pull and shake.  They've saved Knox from a few melt-downs... in fact, Mommy has a near-meltdown if she pulls out of the driveway and realizes the toys are missing.

Other things I ♥ : attachable headrest mirror so I can see Knox while I drive (about $10 at Walmart), Skip-Hop diaper bags, Pack 'n Plays, infant/baby tubs, AYR nose drops for infants, hydrocortisone cream (check with your doctor first: for rashes and irritations).

SKIP IT
definition: Things to consider skipping under certain circumstances.

5. Baby Monitors.  Don't have a heart attack.  Skip this if you have a small house, unless you plan on investing in one with a video screen OR one of the ones that has the motion sensor.  We have a great monitor set, but never use it because Knox can't sneeze in his room without us hearing.  We don't leave him in the house while we're out on the porch or in the backyard either, so it has collected dust.

If you live in a modestly-sized home or apartment, I would also recommend skipping a bottle warmer.  Again, we have an amazing one, but never use it because the nursery is so close to the kitchen, where we prepare the bottles, and we don't make tons of bottles in advance.

I would also skip an over-the-body infant carrier (think baby Bjorn).  I have one that I've used quite a few times, but sometimes it was a trouble > reward situation because when Knox was small, it was a little frightening getting him in and out, and then when he was big I felt like my back was definitely not getting a physically-safe work-out.  It's useful for times when your little one just isn't happy by his or her self and you really need to get some work done, but some good alternatives are a little seat that vibrates (around $20-$30 at Walmart), an infant swing, or simply not doing your chores.

6. Baby Products.  Obviously, not all of them, just these: any butt paste that isn't Boudreaux's.  Shown here is California Baby brand butt cream - I have some Bubble Bath for Cold and Flu in this brand though and it is really nice - I found that the butt cream, while smelling really pretty, was really thin and just didn't compare with BOUDREAUX's!  (Can I get a commission here?)  Don't buy baby powder (most books I read said to definitely NOT use it anyway).

Other things I never use: pacifiers (Knox loathes them) and baby hangers (I use a dresser), a bassinet or a "changing table" (I put a changing pad on top of Knox's dresser).

HACK IT
definition: There's an economical way of getting around these things, and I'll find it for you.

7. Baby food.  Alright, this one might be a Catch-22.  I'm still working up on the cost comparison, but my early estimate is that they're fairly similiar.  The winning punch here is that making your own baby food is much more earth-friendly :-) I have the Kalorik baby food steamer/maker (thanks Nana and Poppa) and I've been using washed baby food containers to freeze and store my home-made organic baby food.  A friend told me she'd puree an organic sweet potato, pour it into an ice cube tray, and voila!  Dinner for her baby for a week!  I love 'making' Knox's food and knowing EXACTLY what goes into it!

8. Boppy Pillow.  If you're more gifted than me with a needle and thread, you can totally hack this.  If not, spring the $40 ish and get it.  Get the pattern here.

9. Diaper Genie.  Instead of paying anywhere between $40 - $100 on a Diaper Genie, plus $20 on the refill bags, I took the advice of another mom who told me her Diaper Genie did nothing to prevent the poop smell from penetrating her nursery.  We bought a $15 step-to-open trash can from Walmart and we re-use plastic grocery bags to tie up diapers as we change them before putting them in the can.  It's a great way to use all those bags instead of throwing them away or letting them pile up because "you'll use them", and it seals the scent just as well as a Genie (or so my friend said).

I hope this helps... remember, sometimes one woman's Boppy is another woman's bottle-warmer.  I've lived and learned when it comes to baby stuff, and this is what I know about life at seven months with baby.  I know that it can all be useful in the right circumstances (read: please don't be offended if your shower gift landed on the 'skip it' list), and I'm grateful that we have all that we do at our testing disposal!

Pride and Joy

Post # I-Forget of Let's-Get-Real

Did you know it's President's Day?  Apparently my district didn't.  Anyway.  Recap: GO!

Enter: super busy weekend
Exit: even trying to post every day

It was a valiant effort.  (Cue applause.)

I know you were eagerly awaiting the update on our Sea Monkeys.  They were knocked over by a visiting two-year-old before they had even hatched.  How have we been coping since the loss?

Well, Friday was Randy's (a.k.a. PaPa, which I have accidentally been spelling PawPaw) 50th birthday party in Albany at The Icehouse restaurant.  (See Facebook for pictures.)  It was fun and relaxing to be around family and fajitas.  It even worked perfectly with our crazy schedule because I traveled to Abilene that day to drop off some artwork for the Grace's Youth Art Month show... check out my students' work at our Art Dept. website.

Saturday was SING SONG! (For Knox and me - Koby went on a hunt that evening.  They got skunked.)  Elizabeth did an amazing job as a cute little firework in an act that was spectacular, astounding, impressive.  Again, great to see family, semi long lost friends AND to have backup when Knox got a little restless.  (At the tippy top of Section J smack dab in the middle.  ACU alumni, you feel me.)  Thankfully, he made it through until post-EOX performance.

Saturday was also Melissa's last basketball game.  Ever.  Finito.  (Sadly, no pictures.)  I can't even tell you how much I admire my younger sister for not only being a woman of integrity, but also for being an incredible athlete, a hard worker, and crazy smart to boot.  She's a graduate student (who graduated with, like a 3.99 as a business major) who works full time and still managed to become UT Tyler's leading women's basketball scorer of all time this year.  What's she going to do next?

Sunday we were visited by friends Derek and Kim as they made their way back from Sing Song, and THEN we visited Brooke and John, who just moved HERE!  What?  Yes!  Welcome to Colorado City, population: your new best friends.  Sunday was also the Day of Regret, as it was the final night before grades were due and Mrs. Andrews still had a pretty hefty stack of Rhythm + Variety Projects to grade.  Weeeeeeeeee.

Here we are in a new week, Knox is officially seven months old TODAY (no picture... yet), and did I hear someone say FIFTEEN (school) DAYS UNTIL SPRING BREAK?!  Oh, it was ME!

Post #14 of 29

Koby and I don't really have a romantic story.

But that's not to say we don't have a love story.

The first Valentine's Day that we were together, I made him a card in one of my graphic design classes (with a waffle on it) and then we went to a BBQ joint with one of his friends.

On one Valentine's Day I was so sick that we cancelled dinner plans and Koby just sat on the couch with me, watching t.v. and intermittently bringing me medicine.

We have probably never successfully surprised each other with a gift, due to a combination of e-mail espionage and the basic inability to keep present secrets from one another.

We don't do grand gestures, we don't believe in Hallmark, and eight times out of ten we prefer grilling and TBS to dinner and a movie. Maybe we're boring according to St. Valentine, and even though some people may not understand our methods of showing affection (did you know a Diet Root Beer can mean "I'm sorry", "I'm thinking of you" or "Happy Valentine's Day"?), others do. I think some people don't notice love when it isn't dramatic and extravagant or if it doesn't sparkle - it's easy to overlook the Diet Root Beers out there when Edward Cullen is running around watching teenaged girls sleep. One of the best things I've ever heard said about Koby and me was after meeting and spending an evening with us at a wedding: a guy told his wife "I like them. They're so in love."

At first it made me laugh really hard. When I picture people "so" in love, I imagine more than diet soda and sea monkeys (my V-day gift for Koby today). But we are so in love, and I feel complimented that someone could tell that just from one evening.

There's something about being with your best friend that makes you feel young, happy and comfortable. That's why it's so awesome that I'm married to mine. What's better than feeling young and in love?  (Answer: getting to feel like that every day.  Especially on the days you're covered in baby poop and pureed carrots.) I might not shout it from the rooftops or spell it out on a banner in the sky, but I can blog about it.

Post #11, 12 and 13 of 29

It's Monday, I've sucked it up again with the whole "post every day" thing, but here's what's new: we spent a happy weekend in Austin with my family (sans a Pack 'N Play for Knox - NOT recommended) and got to visit with some of my college friends at a couples shower for my friend Marie, who is pregnant with her second baby.  It was great to see Abby, Meagan, Caroline, Hayley, all their respective spouses/boyfriends/offspring and of course, Marie...

Marie is one of those friends who's become like family to me.  One of those friends who I wish lived closer, so our kids could grow up together.  Maybe one day.

The morning of the shower I headed over to Marie's house to take some pictures of her baby bump.  Marie is on strict bed rest because of pre-eclampsia, a condition that caused her daughter Lyla to be born at 32 weeks.  She's currently at about 32 weeks with new baby Wyatt, and so we're all praying that she's able to stay pregnant as long as possible to avoid another lengthy stay in the NICU.  Anyway, we popped into her backyard, bribed Lyla with some jelly beans and snapped some non-strenuous photographs.

I can't wait to finish editing the rest of these pictures... two beautiful models = fun and easy work.  Check out www.paintsandpistols.com to see some more photography... and some exciting things are going to be happening with P&P Photography soon, so stay tuned.  Not telling yet.  It's a surprise.

Post #10 of 29

Austin. Christmas. Nana and Poppa. Presents. No Pack 'N Play.

Post #7,8,9 of 29

I may have dropped the ball a bit.  I have an excuse, and here it is:

On Tuesday Knox and I were supporting Koby and the CHS Lady Wolves basketball team (they lost a heartbreaker in overtime by two points - knocked them out of playoff possibility) and as for last night... well, I don't really have an excuse EXCEPT that Koby was home before 5:30 pm (no practice) and we were both so thrilled that we just sat around watching television and eating awesome food.

Today's blog is brought to you by

SOCIAL RELATIVITY  

❝

I hope you’re hungry."

“Interesting. A friendly sentiment in this country, cruel taunt in the Sudan. It’s a lesson in context.

❞

Leonard and Sheldon

- The Big Bang Theory, CBS 

More examples of contextual interpretation.

"You look like you're getting some junk in your trunk."

This was said to me by my husband over the weekend.  For me, it's a statement filled with hope.  For other women, it just might be the thing that their suspiciously missing husband said.  (In any context, he was wrong: I was just swollen from my strep shot.)

Dairy Expiration Date vs. Pay Day 

How is it that when I'm buying milk and I notice that the expiration date is uncomfortably close (sure to happen at Fuller's, by the way), that very same date might be the next pay day and feel tortuously far away?

"You remind me of Drew Barrymore / Leighton Meester  / Elisabeth Moss."

Basically any "compliment" my students give me would be an excellent example of 'social relativity' - it's amazing how they can combine "warm fuzzies" with "cold pricklies".  They've mastered this conversational conundrum to the point where it is almost poetic.  (i.e. "That picture is so pretty!  It doesn't even look like you!" "Thanks and.... Owwwww.")

And finally, the ultimate social relativity ... on days when I'm wondering if I'm a "Never Been Kissed" Drew Barrymore or the newer "Finally Skinny and Pretty Again" model, I get this in the mail.

It's a letter from Clyde, the Filipino child we sponsor through Compassion International*, and his mother.  "Ma'am, I hope that you will never get tired of writing my son and in encouraging him going to school."  Okay, did you want a letter every day?  Because you're reaching over thousands of miles and gripping my heart with your bare hands.  Want a pony?  I bet we can find one to send to Clyde...

And even more often, I'll see this boy.

The beautiful thing about family (and most lovely in the members of your family who can't speak yet) is that your husband, son, sister, mother doesn't care which celebrity tabloid you most resemble in your mismatched pajamas.  Your toddler doesn't care how much junk you're carrying in your trunk.  There's no comparison: it is what it is.  (Although my family does seem to put a lot of stock into how fast I can make a bottle or the ability to remember to switch the clothes from the washer to the dryer.) 


*Click the link to visit Compassion International's site and be sure to read my friend Sarah's inspiring blog post about child sponsorship.

Post #6 of 29

Family, your imaginary Valentines have come early this year. (Don't worry, you still have time to get me something.)

Compiled below is a fantastic composite of things I would buy for my relatives if I had infinity amount of dollars...

For my dear husband,

I'd buy a ranch in some Western state.  (Thinking Wyoming, Montana...)  And we'd call it the Donkey Slobber Ranch and Estate.

For my parents,

for Mom I'd buy the Ballard Carnegie Library in Seattle (which is conveniently for sale) and we could start filling it with books pronto, and for Dad I'd buy a super energy-efficient house.  He's not so much a tree-hugger as ... let's say in an enthusiastic monthly competition with himself to see just how low he can get the energy bill.  He's roped my mom into the game as well, though I think she plays with less than his desired amount of enthusiasm.

For Koby's parents,

I'd buy a Cessna.  The next to-do on their larger than life to-do list (which they're actually tackling!) is to take piloting lessons.  And so here is the plane they will use to fly me to Seattle when I need to add some books to Mom's library or visit Koby on a crazy hunt in Montana.

For my sister,

this shiny whip.  Oh and I'd pay a scientist to cure dogs of car sickness so her Dalmatian Keya could actually ride in it too.

For Koby's sister Elizabeth,

I'd buy an art studio and stock it to the max - acrylic and oil paints, artist-grade brushes, canvases, gesso, easels and watercolor, pens and ink, linoleum cutters, brayers, inks, a printing press, a light board, drafting table and of course, make sure there was a great ventilation system. (**It occurs to me that some people might infer from this that Elizabeth has a problem with flatulence. I would like to take a moment to remind people that lots of artistic media have very toxic fumes. Thanks for your attention, I know Elizabeth appreciates it.)

What would you buy?